Pokemon: Minus and Plus Rumors


TyranitarTube for you non-reading people out there

 

OH SH*T. I’ll always ride with Nintendo, regardless of poor sales for the Wii U. I am happy to say that heard a Rumor around the interwebz, pretty late, but at least I came to the party. The rumor right now is that Nintendo is that they are working with Gamefreak and Pokémon to bring another game. Dual Pixels published some stuff that their little inside man informed them of, and I lost my shit.

>GameFreak were one of the first development studios inside Nintendo to receive Alpha-Prototype hardware, now have been upgraded to the Beta-Prototype hardware above.

>Have a few areas marked out, TONS of concept art traveling between Pokemon Company and Nintendo Co Ltd.

>GameFreak plans to completely overhaul the basic systems of battle, simplifying the process.

>The development team is “going to put a lot of ideas they have wanted to do for years in this game”.

>Two versions already have code names, possibly final: Pokemon Plus and Pokemon Minus.

>Theme is “Old Tradition VS New Exploration”

>New region, no name yet, is based on South East Asia with one large peninsula and many smaller islands.

>Three new starters with no names: Water evolves into Water/Steel and is a squat, teardrop shaped humanoid that has a jar filled with on its head as it evolves it grows taller and the jar bigger until it needs another set of arms to hold it on it’s head. Fire evolves into Fire/Fairy and is a tiny cute goat with fire blowing out of its horns, it’s horns and look evolves more menacing until it has curly ram like horns and a motorcycle hot-rod-like look. Grass evolves into a Grass/Electric and starts with a leap for a face with a nubby root as a body and evolves until it grows into an electric producing palm tree with each flower petal having a different face.

>The main legendary for Pokemon Plus is a Shi Foo Lion-looking Psychic/Ground-type that has multiple faces, the Pokemon Minus legendary is a Ghost/Fairy type that has two dashes for eyes and is a hurricane-like appendages with many arms and hands.

>More traditional Pokemon-like gameplay will be on the Handheld controller while an all new gameplay aspect will be on the Terminal unit.

>The “Pokken Fighers” render that was teased was running on Alpha kits, Beta kits now have advance cell shading. Going for very detailed “living anime” look.

>The new “Team” villains are described as a bunch of “Sohei Zelots”-types who have discovered the player’s best friend as a reincarnation of a special type of person who only is alive every 100 years. They believe the old system where people were given a Pokemon egg and they stick to that Pokemon until they die and who’s function in society dictate what role that person is. They are against the “modern” trend of Pokemon Trainers and capturing multiple Pokemon and are making a holy pilgrimage to evoke the old Legendaries to turn everything back to normal. They keep the player away from their friend, saying the special one (who can do amazing things like mega evolve Pokemon without the use of a mega ring) only love is that of Pokemon and not people. It is planned to be reveal later that for the special one to fulfill their role in society they must be mortally sacrificed to awaken the legendaries.

>Routes connection the island together are water bridges but clumps of island are connected together by underwater tunnels.

>There is a “Stone Slowking” statue that is a parody of the Reclining Buddha at Wat Pho, Thailand.

>Many Pokemon from Hoenn and Sinnoh will make a return.

>Variety of Pokemon Gyms, one is a mail system that only uses flying types and focuses on sky battles. One only uses baby Pokemon, one is implied to be a real vampire and uses Ghost and Dark Pokemon. There is also a military like leader who uses Fire and Steel Pokemon.

>The island gameplay with Gym Leaders and the Elite Four island can be played entirely on the Handheld and can be blown up on the Terminal for home play.

>New Pokemon Type similar to Shinies, no details yet on how they work but I’ve been told they “change the game significantly”.

>The “Mainland” is an MMO-like environment that is exclusive to the Terminal and is shared by both versions.

>Players all over the world online can chat, trade, intermingle and experience new-updated story lines on the mainland.

>Pokemon Band is a new mechanic introduced to get people involved who do not battle, a co-operative experience where Pokemon dance and make music together to achieve the highest group score.

>Pokemon Bank are actual locations on the Mainland and Handheld areas where people can import past Pokemon, mainly from Pokemon X and Pokemon Y into the new game.

My biggest thing with this, is if they’re gonna release the game to 3DS. I’m really hoping they continue to keep the Super Training mini-game that they introduced in X/Y. I am pretty excited that developers are taking a risk to try new things, because I felt like they were holding back with their previous Pokémon game. Here’s to hoping the best in Pokemons’s new venture!

 

70,000 people, Glorious Helix-senpai, and Lift Key-kun

 

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If you haven’t already heard of “Twitch Plays Pokémon” on twitch.tv- you have not internetz enough to be on the webz ever again. 14,000,000 people watching 70,000 people play a game towards a common cause of being a Pokémon master has never. been. so. funny.

The whole concept of the game was created to be a “social experiment” where a group of people play one Pokémon game typing the commands left, right, up, down, select, start, a, and b into the chat box. The bot playing the game then takes that information, and makes Red do the action that was typed. The problem with this is that there are 70,000 people playing this single game making decisions to catch Pokémon and battle gym leaders, and getting to the next town. All of these actions playing by yourself do not take that long, but because everyone is putting in different/same commands- these common tasks take hilarious hours. I went to bed one night at 11 pm and woke up at 6 am to see that everyone was still stuck in Team Rocket’s hideout. People have been checking their items during battles to pull out the all-mighty helix fossil and lift ticket, but Oak won’t let you use it because he knows the power those two items hold. You can almost feel the frustration of people who actually have hope that 70,000 people can work towards a common goal to, at least, collect 8 badges- fuck that. People would rather back-track to the Dark Cave and fight Zubats and Geodudes, so the programmer added a new system where players can choose between Democracy and Anarchy.

The Democracy and Anarchy thing works like so:

Anarchy mode is the “classic” mode, where everyone’s inputs are applied immediately.

Democracy mode is vote-based and has a more sophisticated input system.

In order to switch from one mode to the other, the mode that isn’t active needs 75% of votes as indicated by the dotted line, the current percentage of votes is indicated by the black line.

In democracy mode you can compile a sequence of inputs. left2 will move left twice, left2down2 will move left twice and down twice”

Which actually added for more hilariousness! I fucking laughed so hard when people used democracy to actually make it to the Celedon City gym, and couldn’t cut the tree that blocks the entrance to the gym- only for enough people to vote for anarchy to drag everyone back to Team Rocket’s hideout.

The programmer calls it a social experiment, and he may be right…but I cannot stop laughing at the fact that everyone has been stuck in the dark cave for almost an hour now- with no flash TM activated. Check the madness out though, it definitely is worth the watch.

www.twitch.tv/twitchplayspokemon

Looking At: The Division

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We’ve all had those conversations with our friends. We’ve all actually came up with a real plan for each other in the event of a apocalypse! I have, you have, my wife has, my nephew has, my dad probably did, and I bet you the president has a plan for an apocalypse. My friends and I would always talk about this. What weapons would we carry, what our movement plan is, shelter, and anything else that goes with survival. I thought we would make an epic team, but now– I can finally put our theories to the test. I can finally test the limits of our friendship and teamwork with Tom Clancy’s The Division.

The first time I saw the gameplay for The Division, I fucking praised the gaming gawdz. I dropped to my knees and pulled out my debit card yelling, “Take my money Ubisoft! Take all of my money and take my soul!” I literally thanked the heavens for an MMO shooter for consoles. With PC gamers being “blessed” with the survival MMO Day Z, and a plethora of MMO RPGs over the years; I got kind of jealous. Then they slap me across the face with a game that says, “Hey you! Do you want to play WoW? Do you want to play Day Z? Do you want to not spend money on a high end laptop to play an MMO RPG? TAKE A LOOK AT THE DIVISION.”

THE SKINNY

The Division is inspired by Operation Dark Winter and Directive 51, real-world events which “revealed how vulnerable we’ve become”; society has become “fragile” and “complex”. In the game a disease that spreads on Black Friday wrecks the U.S. with its stripper butt germs, cocaine, and shame. This causes the U.S. to collapse in five days. The player is a part of a group called “Strategic Homeland Division” or SHD–or The Division.. which is short for “bad-ass”. This group was formed to combat the threat, and do whatever it takes to “save what remains” in a massive multiplayer online situation. Which means you’ll be shooting AIs with your friends, and fighting to survive against (or with) other players.

The Division takes place in New York City, which I think is gonna be dope, because New York City IRL is booming with so much life that I think it would be a big warzone to actually survive in against other players, and against the AIs. It’s a 3rd person shooter with RPG elements, so the system kind of reminds me of Mass Effect and Ghost Recon had a baby. Visually stunning. Watching the trailer and seeing the snow fall and the environment around me made me feel like I was actually watching this shit happen in New York. The graphics are beautiful, and I expect no less from a next gen console. The shit that got me is the fact that you can control a drone from your tablet. You can leave the game for a little bit, get on the toilet, and control a drone to help your teammates. With the drone you can tag enemies for your teammates, and shoot predator missiles at the people you get into engagements with. This game was originally for next gen consoles, but PC gamers asked for it too. They always get what they want, so Ubisoft blessed PC gamers with the game as well. 

IMO

Like I said, I’m really stoked to have a MMO RPG Shooter make its way to consoles. With shooters being a popular thing in console games, and survival being a huge obsession since The Walking Dead; it only made sense to bring The Division to consoles. I was also really excited to have a game where you can play something with you friends online that didn’t involve kill streaks, TDM, and COD in general. This is the game that is gonna help me decide which friends I want to keep during and apocalypse, and even help me determine whether I’m ready for an apocalypse. With the upsides, usually come the downsides to releasing this game for consoles. This game might be Rated M, but I am almost sure that every parent in Murica will ignore the living shit out of this; that’s just how society is nowadays. There will be kids playing this game, and depending on their online maturity; they could either make the game fun or ruin the experience like they always do *cough* COD *cough*. One thing I also observed is the fact that trolls still exist. I’ve witnessed it on Day Z— during the beta where players were dying left and right, because other players thought it was fun to snipe noobs instead of killing zombies. I fear that this could be a problem with The Division on a different and more epic scale than Day Z. You are looking at console gamers, and I don’t mean all of us, but let’s be for real– console gamers are douchebags. Not all of them are gonna let you progress in this game. You’re bringing a shooting game that looks like it requires a little bit of maturity to a bunch of gamers who are getting their kicks from fast paced 1st person shooters like COD or Battlefield. I think since the option to fuck up another player’s day is available, it’ll be used more than the option to complete a mission. I also really fucking hope that Ubisoft doesn’t get greedy with power, and makes it so that you can buy these OP weapons and gear on some WoW shit. I hate that about new-age gaming. You can buy an OP weapon for $50 on the online store, but you have to fight long and hard to get an “OK” in-game weapon. I feel that we need to get away from that aspect of gaming, and just make the game fun with secrets and all the other good shit. Although I am excited for the game, I’m also worried that Ubisoft is baiting me on some bullshit. I feel like they’re luring me to their white van with the promise of good graphics and candy, and as soon as I reach for it–I get kidnapped.. never to be seen again.

Overall I may have my worries about the game, but I am actually pretty stoked for this game. I’ve been waiting for a good game with an open world to explore with friends, and my prayers were finally answered. The Division is slated to drop in the 4th quarter of 2014, hopefully they don’t push the date back like a line-up. Now I want to hear from you! What are you most excited about for The Division, and what are you worried about? Comment below!

Thanks once again for making it this far! Don’t forget to follow the blog, or follow me on twitter @ashezketchum I inform followers on that piece when a new blog comes out, and I like to think to myself..to the whole social network of twitter.

 

 

Happy New Years/I’m buying LoZ: A Link between Times!

If I had a picture of what my New Years was like, it would be pretty depressing. Instead, I’m wishing you all a Happy New Year! In 120 days I will be back on US soil catching up with old games, new games, new movies, old movies, new comics, old comics, and spending precious time with family. If my new year’s resolution could be anything, it would be to spend more time having fun with my family. I definitely have overlooked going on adventures with my family, so I will spend half of 2014 concentrating on creating memories. 

In other news, I have been looking for a new game to play on my newly purchased 3DS that my lovely wife sent to me. After playing Pokémon nonstop after work, I have decided it is time to experience my 3DS for more than just Pokémon. After lazily browsing the internet, and skimming through YouTube; I have found my calling. The game I have decided to buy is Legend of Zelda: A Link between Worlds. The way I have always operated since becoming a gamer, is to never read a review if the game has already been played and I don’t own it. Of course I can’t avoid reading stuff I see in commercials, but if its been out for awhile and I don’t own it- I don’t read the reviews. This makes the new LoZ a treat for yours truly. I haven’t owned a 3DS since it first came out, so being a recent 3DS owner helped me to realize that I truly missed out on some good games (except Pokémon).

So judging by the trailer, the new LoZ game is based on the world that a Link to the Past was based on. They brought back the old style Link that doesn’t sport the tights and chainmail armor. I’m liking the look, mostly because it reminds me of a happier time in my 16bit childhood. I give Nintendo major kudos for revitalizing the look of Link over the years, but also for honoring the old look of Link. The wall thing that Link does tripped me the fuck out, especially the part where he knocks over a bridge to cross a gap. I can see graffiti artists, or street artists, hitting up “wall Link” on walls…get it? Cuz wall Link…walls…ok. The protagonist looks like someone I really want to kill, so thanks Nintendo. I really got the feeling to smash the face of the bad guy into a moving train by just looking at her..him..it. I’m honestly pretty stoked to have this game sent to me ASAP. I am a little bummed out that I missed out on this game, and didn’t get a chance to get my hands on it earlier. Fuck it, I’m still gonna do a review for the game, because I feel like it’s gonna be so good; it’s gonna need a late review.

Like I said before, Happy New Years to the lot of you, and I really hope you do something with your lives to improve it this year. If you like this blog follow me. If you don’t have a WordPress, you can follow me on twitter @ashezketchum. I’m still pretty much planning what days I will be blogging on which topic, but I’m pretty sure I’ll figure it out when I get back to the states.

I would also like to know what your favorite/least favorite LoZ game. My favorite one was Twilight Princess. Why? Because you transformed into a wolf. What I liked to do when I play TP was listen to “Thriller” and eat my enemies like fucking snausages. Comment below, and let me know what YOUR favorite, or least favorite, LoZ game was.

 

D&D Story and Review

As said before, I played D&D with the people in my unit. I was almost late, but the Dungeon Master was running pretty late today too. I’m not gonna lie, I was still pretty stoked to try something new. A total of seven people showed up for this event, there was pizza, and we were all laughing about the possibility of me kicking in a door- using it as a surfboard and killing all the enemies. That laughter soon died down. This game suddenly became real, and the dice gawdz were not there to save me.

We spent an hour and a half helping everyone get their character sheets together, so no one was over-powered. It wasn’t bad, we bonded as a group. Like I said, that soon pretty much ended. My character was a fighter class (Warrior) true neutral. I made it so that I could do whatever I wanted, and not held back by stupid alignments. Our journey started. I was in the southern region headed north, when a hobbit ran into me. We travelled together since we were going the same way, when suddenly, we were met by some warthogs. We got fucked up. It was so bad. Three boars, and we were pretty much down for the count. DM gave us a chance, and made it so that these boars were no longer interested.

Me and my hobbit homeboy make it into town, battered and bruised, screaming for help. We make it to Jolly old St. Nick’s home. We meet up with two other characters, and have our HP restored. Santa has a task for us. He has the ability to heal us with his magic cookies and milk, but he wants us to find his elves, who have been abducted, leaving one elf; Herby. Now in my mind, I already knew which elf that was. I already pieced together that Herby was that dentist elf. Before we left to see Herby, we get presents from Santa. Everyone rolled for a chance at a gift from Santa and receive their gifts- all except me- I didn’t receive shit, because I couldn’t roll higher than a 14. I was fucked from the beginning.

We go to Herby’s house and knock on the door. Herby invites us in, but he wants to work on our teeth. I ask Herby for proof that he is a certified dental hygienist, and I’m kicked out of his fucking house. So the other character hops in the chair, and he checks her teeth. All is good. We ask for information on the elves, and Herby says he’ll tell us if he gets to work on all our teeth. I get fucked again. I have to get a teeth removed before I can venture any further. I do it, and Herby asks to come with us to fin the elves. My hobbit homeboy says yes. I say no. I do not like Herby.

We venture with Herby anyways, because he knows where these elves went. He takes us to a cave, and we enter. We search these fucking caves, and all hell breaks loose when we run into hobgoblins. These Hobgoblins fucked us up. We had no good rolls, and the DM kept getting good rolls. We eventually kill these hobgoblins, and we call it quits for the day. I was fucking mad as shit.

THE REVIEW:

D&D is a fun game- in theory. They give you the stuff do play, and the DM creates the story for you to play. The Christmas Story is a good story so far. It was like Kingdom Hearts with Christmas characters. I wouldn’t be surprised if we ran into Jack Frost, Frosty, or The Yeti. However, the enemies, for how weak they should have been, were too OP. We had to roll a 15 or higher to defeat the hobgoblins, and a 12 or higher to beat the hogs. I don’t think we’ll be winning this game anytime soon, with how strong these enemies are, and how much EXP we receive (received 60 EXP for defeating the hobgoblins, and it’s 1000 to lvl up.)

The people I played with are, straight up, comedians. It was fun, and we were all generally new at the game, so the atmosphere was pretty light. When conversing in characters, it almost made for a better comedy than a serious adventure. I love dialogue, so when in character, I made fun of everyone’s character. What makes this game, IMO, is the fact that you have to be in he same room with these people to play. It was pretty social, and I laughed with people that I would not laugh with in a professional environment. So D&D gets me for that.

The major things I didn’t like were the dice and the DM. In order to have a good game of D&D is to have a good DM. You don’t want one that is too easy on you, but you don’t want one that makes it so hard that you can barely get past a common monster. I literally could not get past these hogs, unless the DM would have fucking let these hogs roll out. And the hobgoblins…the amount it took just to hit them, was boss level. Even as a beginner, I knew that these creatures were too damn OP. Another thing that kind of annoyed me, was how much XP it took to actually level up. Holy shit, 1000? And the two hobgoblins I killed only gave me 60xp? I wanted to flip the fucking table so bad. So when you play with a DM, make sure that they have set up a fair, and balanced game. The dice were another thing. I didn’t like that some things were left to chance, and the probability of some actions were too low to be achieved. For example, I didn’t receive a cool weapon like everyone else. I asked “Santa” to look into my heart for some good, so I may receive a weapon. He accepted, but the probabilities of me receiving, I had to roll higher than 17 on a 20 sided die. Again, nothing wrong with the dice, it was the DM’s choice. However, if you have no luck with dice, like me, you could get royally fucked like I did.

Overall, I like the game, but there’s too many variables. You could have a good DM who is fair, or you can have a DM who is out to fuck you. You could get some really good rolls, or you can get really shitty rolls. I do like the fact that you have to use your imagination to make shit happen, and I like how social the game is, despite the bad things said about D&D through the years. I can say this- playing the game beats watching that god-awful movie.

I would recommend people who are already within the nerd/geek/outcast culture to at least try D&D if they haven’t yet. It’s a really fun game, if you play with the right people. You could either have a really good experience, a shitty experience, or a so-so experience. Either way, it definitely is a “try at least once” thing. I won’t be done playing yet, we meet next Saturday to continue the story. I, on the other hand, will hopefully come across some rope. I’m going to tie the rope around myself, and hang myself from a cliff- ending my character’s life, so that I no longer have to live in a world where I miss a hobgoblin 15 times before I even injure him.

 

 

D&D

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YES! My boredom has reached its max capacity, and I have been invited to play Dungeons and Dragons with the “Unit Nerds”. Personally, I think this is going to be an awesome experience. The rules are long, there’s too many manuals, and games like WoW exist. Why play this? Because D&D is a social gathering of nerds, geeks, outcasts, half-nerds, half-geeks, and people stuck in between trying to be cool and loving nerdy shit.

Dungeons and Dragons, or D&D, is an RPG game before RPG games. You do shit, and try not to get killed from what I understand. A friend of mine has been trying to school me in the art of D&D, but I’m gonna do what I always do, and fucking wing it. I did make my character sheet, and I had a lot of fun with that. Totally not me. My character’s name is G. He’s 6’0″, light brown eyes, black hair, awesome beard, and a warrior class. I didn’t know how the Dungeon Master was gonna be, so I started with a long spear and pretty weak gear. I made him a true neutral, so that I may do whatever I fucking please. The funny part about all of this is at the end of the character creation, you have to make a bio for your character. I bugged my friend about this, and he said that it helps other people understand your character. Since I made my character at work, and was kind of in a rush, I ripped off Star Wars: A New Hope, and gave my character Luke Skywalker’s story. I made sure to include that my character saw his Aunt and Uncle burnt to a crisp.

That’s all I have for now. The game is tomorrow at 1030, and I will be blogging the post game results, my thoughts on D&D, and how well I did in comparison to others.

ALSO: Follow me on twitterland my handle is @ashezketchum, and if you happen to come across this blog, and find it interesting (or not) share it with someone! link them! do something!  

Nintendo..Srsly..WTF.

I’ve been hitting Nintendo pretty hard since this deployment. It’s probably the fact that we have nothing to talk about, so we talk about anything. Sure, Nintendo just released Pokémon, but no matter what they do with their main console; they always fuck up everything. No matter how hard I try to defend Nintendo, they do shit like this. Constantly putting out bullshit at big events. I know I may be behind the times right now, but you can’t blame me; I’m deployed. When I first heard about the Cranky Kong announcement at the Video Game Awards, I lost my shit. Out of all the things you could’ve announced, you announce Cranky Kong. For some of you youngsters out there who didn’t get to play Donkey Kong Country, Cranky Kong is the old ass monkey at the beginning of the game who cranks the old ass record player. He is also the monkey you constantly run into to save the game. in DKC1 and 2. I never thought about Cranky Kong as a child. I never wanted to play as him as a child. It never ever eeeeevvveeeerrr crossed my mind like, “Oh man it would be so cool to play as this old ass monkey.” But Nintendo insists that this is a great idea, and the gaming community would love to see Cranky put in work. This brings me to my next topic, could this be the warning signs that Nintendo has reached its limits as a competing console in the new generation?

Now, from what I remember growing up, I’ve always been a Nintendo kid. My mom was the one who actually turned me into a video game addict. If it weren’t for video games, I probably would be doing heroine or bath salts right now. I’d probably be spending time in the glass pipes, instead of helping Mario get down these pipes..no homo. I owned the consoles running up to the N64, and during that time when the 64 came out- it seemed like every kid has to own one. Every kid played Nintendo, until every single kid in my neighborhood decided N64 wasn’t on par with PlayStation. Nintendo and PlayStation were competing at this point. The glory days when kids were repping consoles like they were gangbangin’. The evidence of this beef was pretty real..I was playing “Hey You, Pikachu!” on N64 when it came out. I said “PlayStation” into the mic out of boredom, and Pikachu literally lost his shit. He wasn’t talking anymore, he didn’t want anything to do with me, turned his back on me, and I was like, “Fuck you too, you little bitch wa’nt no one trinna play witcho ass anyway.” That last part didn’t happen, but you do have to apologize to Pikachu before he starts fuckin’ with you again. THAT WAS SOME REAL SHIT. Nintendo was not fuckin’ around with PlayStation! I owned both consoles at the time, and never really had a biased towards either system. But no lie, A lot of shitty games were getting released on the N64. I found myself playing more and more of PS1, and less and less of N64. However, the one thing Nintendo has always had, was Pokémon. So, I always played Pokémon, but I played a lot of PS1 too.

Back then I would have never seen this as a pivotal point with Nintendo, but I definitely felt it when the PS2 and XBOX came out. Soon, I totally forgot about my N64. I disregarded the Gamecube. I didn’t miss out on some awesome games that they put out thanks to friends who owned Gamecubes, but I betrayed the shit out of Nintendo. This is when everyone was saying that Nintendo was a “child’s console”. Sooner or later people stopped holding Gamecube to the same standard as XBOX and PS2, especially after the release of XBOX360 and PS3. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I do believe Nintendo was in talks about the Wii, yet at the release of the 360 and the PS4; Nintendo was still stuck on Gamecube. Nintendo did make a comeback, They finally released the Wii, and it was a big hit. Nintendo started targeting younger gamers, and made the Wii family oriented. Gamers who loved Nintendo asked for more. They wanted to see more LoZ, more Metroid, more Star Fox (lol), and more Super Smash Bros. Nintendo finally beckoned to the call, and released some good fucking games. Among those games, Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess stood out. Holy fuck did I love that game. I dedicated my life to that game at one point, as did others, I’m sure. It even won Game of the Year. I really thought Nintendo was gonna make its comeback, but soon that light would fade.. Nintendo would go back to its shitty ways. Nintendo did have its spurts (lol) of success, Donkey Kong Country was a huge hit. After Street FIghter made side scrollers cool again, Mario was a big hit. Like I said, they had their moments. Then another big “FUCK YOU” to Nintendo was said by Microsoft and Sony; the XBOX ONE and the PS4. Nintendo’s counter punch? Wii U.

This is where the violins and sad music cue. Nintendo has been making shitty decision after shitty decision. They released the Wii U, but they were not doing these things that XBOX and PS were doing. I won’t lie, Nintendo has put out some good fucking games, but fans keep asking for the same shit that XBOX and PS have. It’s like fans want something, and Nintendo does the complete opposite thinking life is all good in the gaming universe. No. No the fuck it’s not dammit. 2013 is closing, and Nintendo keeps playing that sad tune. Wii U sales are doing poorly. They decided to release the new Mario game the same time as the XBOX ONE- praying for a miracle. Nintendo has been making some really shitty decisions lately, and they will not stop. Shit like Cranky Kong being a playable character will not save Nintendo. The only thing saving Nintendo right now, is nostalgia and childhood dreams. I really fucking feel like I am gonna live to hear the children laughing at my beloved Nintendo being forced to become a 3rd party company, because Nintendo doesn’t know how to get their shit together. I’ll be 40 y/o and some punk is gonna be taking to his friend saying, “Hey, you heard that kiddie console Ninten-low-on-dough became a 3rd party company now right?” They’ll laugh and I’ll say, “HEY! If it weren’t for NINTENDO you pussies wouldn’t have your XBOX1080 and PS7s!” Then they’ll laugh and point at me, “LAWWWLOLOLOOL STFU OLD TIMER! YOU NEED TO TAKE YOUR MEDICINE NINTENDO AIN’T SHIT.” Then they’ll rob me and probably steal my car.

Look, I’m not a Nintendo hater, I love Nintendo. Nintendo has brought me so many memories as a child, and is the reason for me playing games today. That’s why I want to see them do well. I want them to keep being Nintendo, keep putting games out, keep making consoles, and keep introducing kids to timeless characters and gameplay. It is true that the games they put out (sometimes) are amazing. They are fun, but with Nintendo basically being out of the running in next gen consoles; my nightmare could be a reality. If they keep putting out bullshit info, and actually put info out that everyone can be excited about; there could still be hope for Nintendo. I’m really hoping that 2014 will be a good year for Nintendo, because shit isn’t looking too good for them.